The Heart of Lilibelle Marie: What I Am + What I'm Not

As a newer blogger, I still feel myself struggling to find my voice at times, and to create a cohesive style so that my content and overall message are consistent. I don’t yet know what this blog will turn into—mommy blogging with a side of beauty/fashion? DIY with a bit of lifestyle thrown in? Design focus? Right now, it’s sort of a mashup of all those things—all interests of mine, things I could probably write about with some degree of authority. But I have no idea what shape this blog will start to take as I find more solid footing with it, or what the true focus will end up being.

But I do know who I am at my core, and what I’m about. I’m well aware of the complaints that are out there about other blogs who maybe have lost a bit of their essence as they’ve become successful and able to profit from their blogs. And while I know I can’t please everyone (nor would I want to), it’s been invaluable to look at other bloggers and pick up a few things I want to do—or do NOT want to do. Whether this blog ever becomes anything profitable or highly visible, I don’t want the heart of it all to change. I don’t ever want to compromise the things I believe, no matter what happens in the future.

1. I do not believe in one-size-fits-all style.

The absolute last thing I want to be is cookie cutter. I’m sure we can all think of a few blogs who closely resemble one another, right down to the identical shoes and bags. It’s as though one person decides what the items-of-the-year will be, and everyone else simply buys those same items and wears them in similar ways so they can appeal to the same fanbase.

I’m not saying that I don’t hop on certain trends (love the full skirt trend), or that I don’t shop at some of the same stores. (I love J.Crew and Kate Spade, which happen to be very popular at the moment.) But what I am saying is that I don’t want to recreate outfits or photography style or home décor that others have already used. I want to do this thing my own way, not follow someone else’s.

2. I do not believe in flashing status items to gain style points.

This goes hand in hand with #1. I do not believe in buying the $2000 “it bag” of the season so I can wear it around and try to solidify myself as stylish. That’s not style; that’s buying an expensive on-trend item and hoping the allure and beauty of that piece transfers to you. Anyone can take their money and do this.

I believe that style should be accessible. I do wear designer or higher-end items a fair bit (bags, shoes, and jeans in particular), but I buy designer in ways that are more realistic for most women. Style trumps label any day, and I frequently shop at places like Target and Goodwill for this reason. My taste is fun and pretty, but attainable.

3. I believe in being honest and REAL.

This means you will only see me photographed in pieces I’m actually wearing. You will only hear me talking about products I use and love. I don’t want to get to the point of “staging” my looks for pictures. I love heels, but let’s be honest—with two kids, I am probably wearing flats at least five days out of the week.

I will never “sell out” for a paycheck, because to be frank, keeping this blog true to ME is more important than profit, and I don’t need the money anyway. I just want to share the things I love and connect with those who share common ground with me.

4. I welcome all opinions.

Make no mistake, this is a place of positivity and I will not tolerate pointless negativity or rudeness. But that doesn’t mean we have to agree about everything, or that I’m looking for constant praise without question. This is also a place of HONESTY. I would hate to think that there is anything my readers and friends could say behind my back that they wouldn’t feel comfortable saying to my face. I am really easy to get along with, I promise.

I am not one of those women who will censor comments in order to maintain a certain image. If you have a differing opinion, or if you have input about what you like/don’t like about my blog, I welcome those comments (or emails, if you’d rather keep it between us). I ask that you be respectful—we all know when we’re saying something to be helpful or because we feel our voice should be heard, vs. saying something just to be condescending and destructive. Use good manners, and you can say whatever you want to me. I would certainly rather hear it personally from you.

5. I am not a clique girl. Never have been and never will be.

I choose my own circle of friends. I don’t automatically like or dislike someone because of others’ opinions. And it kills me when some bloggers will only talk to or collaborate with others who have at least a certain number of followers. These women probably are/were awesome before their blog success made them feel like they have to be so choosy with their friendships!

I’m always open to friendships with anyone who clicks with me! I really don’t care how much or how little social pull someone has. If we have things in common, don’t be afraid to reach out!

That’s what I’ve got for the moment.

I do want to clarify that I don’t think there is anything wrong with big blogs or the more “aspirational lifestyle” fashion bloggers. I follow some of them and generally like them and their content. It’s just not who I am or want to try to be.

I find that it’s easy for the more-aspirational blogs to lose a bit of their humanity along the way. I think that’s sort of a given when the point is to be outside of most people’s realm of what is realistically attainable. I’m not here to hide behind clothes or present a façade of, “Don’t you envy my perfect life?” I’m just documenting the random pieces of my life and things I like, and finding inspiration in other women in the process.

My life is silly and messy and sometimes not as pretty as I would like, but that’s kind of the point. I’m really just a regular girl, trying to fill my life with as much style and inspiration as possible.

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